I Just Watch It for the Clothes

I often hear people lamenting "the media's" influence on our society, on how women perceive themselves, on what girls are raised to believe about themselves, etc..., as though "the media" is the culprit of everything oppressive and misogynistic in our culture.  If only the media would be more positive, more affirming and stop assaulting us with images of thin, beautiful, big-chested, vapid bimbos.  But there's a reason why shows like The Bachelor, The Real Housewives, America's Next Top Model (and America's most ruthless sadist, Tyra) exist, and it's not because men are glued to the screen or because the evil media is bent on destroying everything good in our culture.  We watch these shows.  And no one is making us.  Why do we engage in this acknowledged self-destructive, anti-feminist pastime?

I used to say, when caught watching something embarassing like Melrose Place, "I just watch it for the clothes."  I hoped that this confession would absolve me of feminist guilt, even though I knew the men in the show were pigs, the women maybe worse, and that the whole thing flew in the face of almost everything I believe to be good and valuable. But isn't it okay to try to find out what the latest styles are?  Or simply fantasize about "having it all" as in The Real Housewives?  And what about girl power shows like Grey's Anatomy, aren't these affirming my commitment to women's rights?

Susan J. Douglas in her book Enlightened Sexism: The Seductive Message that Feminism's Work is Done, argues no, fantasizing through either type of show isn't okay because "slithering just below the shiny mirage of power is the dark, sneaky serpent of sexism." Douglas claims that, "the media have been giving us, little more than fantasies of power.  They assure girls and women, repeatedly, that women's liberation is a fait accompli and that we are stronger, more successful, more sexually in control, more fearless, and more held in awe than we actually are."  She observes that shows like Law and Order, Grey's Anatomy, and The Closer reinforce the idea that feminism's political work is done, women can be anything, do anything, and earn respect from men.  While at the same time, on other stations or time slots, younger women and girls are sold the message that since women can do anything, then feminism is old fashioned and dowdy, that "girl power" is the new feminism.  This means that girls can reclaim their femininity and use their sexuality as a source of power. (Of course this sexual power is just a repackaged Daisy Duke, sexually provocative in pursuit of male approval.) The notion that feminism's work is done allows for what Douglas calls "enlightened sexism":

Enlightened sexism sells the line that it is precisely through women's calculated deployment of their faces, bodies, attire and sexuality that they gain and enjoy true power - power that is fun, that men will not resent, and indeed will embrace.  True power here has nothing to do with economic independence or professional achievement (that's a given): it has to do with getting men to lust after you and other women to envy you.

Personally, I can't bear to watch The Bachelor with the poor girls throwing there bodies at some less than intelligent "prince charming", but I do find myself tuning into The Real Housewives when I'm too exhausted after the kids are in bed to do anything but be entertained.  Why???  Because I enjoy feeling superior to the unintellectual, plastic-beauty slaves? Maybe.  Or is it because I envy them and am sucked into a masochistic hour of voyeurism?  Douglas argues that enlightened sexism has been driven by marketing tactics, "the use of that heady mix of flattery and denigration to sell us everything from skin cream to running shoes," and I would add patriarchy to the list of hawked goods.  The Real Housewives flatters me by triggering my sense of superiority, while at the same time denigrating my sense of self because I could never look as glamorous or spend anywhere near as much money as these women. (For most of these women their wealth comes from their men - with the exception of a few women on the OC edition).  The fantasy this show sells, is that if I were sexy, materialistic, catty and dumb, then all my days would be filled with luxury and ease - the perfect fanatsy at the end of long day tending children! I agree with Douglas that these shows are selling us sexism, and I would go on to say they are selling us oppression, subjugation and a betrayal of our feminist ancestors (think Susan B .Anthony or Elizabeth Cady Stanton).

While Douglas's analysis is provocative, entertaining, and challenging, she places blame primarily on the media and it's drive to sell. I would argue that we are complicit with the media in perpetuating this myth that feminism is over.  If we didn't watch the stuff, then it wouldn't be aired, period. What makes this "slithery serpent" even more dangerous, is that our daughters, nieces and friends are seeing this "enlightened sexism" without any sense of the importance of maintaining feminist standards. I fear that one day feminism could be dead, and gone.  If we don't continue to fight against "enlightened sexism", then our daughters will forget that feminism ever mattered, and find themselves (and their daughters) stuck in an oppressive misogynistic culture.

What are your thoughts?  Do you find yourself endulging in a "guilty pleasure", watching something that you know protrays women as objects?  Do you fantasize (like I have on occassion) of being that object, of feeling power in objectification?